God's grace

As advised by the professor, I appeared for the Pre-University examinations and to the surprise of all my friends and family members, I passed the examinations.In fact during the examinations days I had no energy even to sit and used to study at home  lying down in the bed.It is still a mystery to me how I passed the exams.The first thing I did after hearing the news of passing the exam. was to meet my professor and thanked him profusely for the  advice he had given at the right time.

During the pre-university days in the college, I had attended a Gandhian study course,  recommended by a professor of the college who himself was a true Gandhian in word and deed..That course opened my eyes on many aspects of life and I started adoring the ideas of Gandhiji, particulary the theory that  violence by individuals does not solve any problem permanently, rather it fuels further violence and hatread and make life on earth for all unhappy .I did not much appreciate the Gandhian economics  at that time.But the most important thing happened during the study circle meetings was my meeting with RD..a true independent thinker  and  a true spiritual seeker.

My constant interaction with RD during the years1957--1961 changed my attitude towards life and philosophy of life.I started again going to temples, particularly Vadakkumnathan and Guruvayur along with RD.During those days Swamy Chinmayananda used to come to Thrissur every year for delivering lectures on Bhagavat Geeta and  those lectures had   inspired me to read our spiritual treasures hitherto ignored because I did not know Sanskrit.Through his talks  in English, Swamiji could bring back  many youth of kerala at that time to respect our religion and religious books, a  himalayan task which probably people do not fully understand even now..Every year I used to eagerly wait for theGeeta Gyana Yagya days arranged before Vadakkumnathan temple in the evenings and read the books written by Swamiji on various aspects of Hindu way of life.
Earlier I had no faith in prayers, but due to the changes brought about in the life, I started slowly praying for  fulfilment of small wishes.I remember the final year B.A examination  day when I was late in leaving home for the college.It took more time to revise  important topics and .I reached the bus stop and found none of my co-students waiting for the bus, indicating that the9.30 bus had already left.I did not know when was the next bus to come. and in those days buses were few and far between.I waited for some time, no bus turned up, time was running fast and I was very much worried.It takes about 45minutes to 1 hour to reach the college by walking and there was no meaning in reaching the exam hall after 30 minutes past the start time .I thought of running to the college but then after running about 5 kilometers it would be difficult to sit and write the examination due to exhaustion..If I do not appear for the last exam, I will loose an year. and  face all problems  of disgrace,  studying all subjects again and the like.At that moment  of helplessness my thoughts went toGod and I started praying to Vadakkumnathan, Shiva  the lord of himalayas, the Adi Guru and the Lord who is pleased  even by little prayer and sacrifices..Those days buses and cars were few and there were no autorickshaws or cycle rickshaws. Manual rickshaws never came from the town to such far of places like our village..One or two trucks passed by but they did not stop though I waived my hand to stop them.Time was fleeing fast and my tension also increased. Suddenly a car stopped infront of me and the driver asked where  did I want to go.I said  to the college and it was the last exam .day and that I was late.The driver felt pity on me and told' Ok you get in and I will drop you at the college."I did not ask him from where he was coming from and  where he was going to.There was no one else in the car.I was  thinking all the time whether I could reach the college in time or not.When we reached the college it was just 10 am and the students had already entered the exam .hall .I gave the driver  one rupee( I think) the only money I had in my pocket, but the gentleman refused and drove away quickly ,smiling.I thanked him and thanked vadakkumnathan for the timely help.
When I narrated the incident, my atheist friends  told that It was only by  luck that I got the car  in time and there was no supernatural intervention in the matter. But I was convinced that it was due to my intense prayer that I could get a car in time and reach  the exam hall in time, let whatever  people may think about it.
There were many more incidents where  my small prayers   were fulfilled but  to describe all of them  require considerable time and space.

What Amma said this Sunday

For obtaining everlasting peace and happiness in life it is necessary to dedicate every effort to God.Even for getting the desired  result of our efforts it is nessary to obtain God's blessings as apart from our efforts there are many factors( unknown to us) that influence the result.It is only when all factors are favourable that we get the desired result.It is only through God's blessings that all factors become favourable
How to get God's blessing? It is only through completely surrendering our ego and dedicating  all efforts  to God that we deserve His blessings.

Amma gives a story.Once a  trader died and he reached the portals of heaven.But the door was closed and he could not enter.So he shouted "Are there people here to let me in" On hearing that the gate keeper came out and told him that to enter heaven one should have 1000points to his credit obtained through doing good deeds in life.Then the trader told that he had done lot of good things in his lifeon earth and if computed it would cross the required points and he would be eligible to enter. He narrated the good things  he had done".My wife  was always angry and whenever she  was angry  I never retorted"Ok you get one point for that" told the gate keeper. "I  had educated an orphan child at my expence"Ok. you get two points for that"In this way the trader calculated the total points he earned by doing good deeds but he could get only twenty points all together and he became  depressed over the thought that  he could not enter heaven.Finally he told "Oh God only you can now help me."At that moment an angel came and opened the door and took the trader inside.
.What is the essence of this story.It is only by surrendering to God that we obtain his grace and blessings.There are limitations of human effort.It is only when we know that we are nothing and  we are only  instruments in his hand  and then make efforts that his blessings will flow to us and we will be blessed with the desired fruits  of our action. We must always remember that it is only through God's power that we are taken forward in life